The world’s smallest republic, the pacific island nation of Nauru, decided to recognize Abkhazia, a breakaway region of the republic of Georgia as a separate country recently. Nauru is more or less a rock in the south pacific that is about 8 square miles and contains approximately 11,000 residents. It seems to be rather scenic although that doesn’t count for much at the U.N., just ask New Zealand. At least they don’t have a show on MTV that makes them all look bad. I’m pretty sure it’s one of those countries you might be able to buy for like $10,000 and a promise not to invite any Scientologists. With all that in mind I guess the people of Abkhazia will apparently take what they can get as they were pretty excited about Nauru’s announcement, although I find it hard to see how this gets them closer to true independence. It’s not like other countries are going to say to themselves “Well, for a while I wasn’t sure, but now that Nauru is on board, I am totally down with recognizing them as a sovereign nation.”

Nauru is the 4th country to recognize Abkhazia officially, joining Russia, Venezuela, & Nicaragua on the list, so now it’s a party. I think Russia did it because they have an axe to grind with Georgia and couldn’t find the right message to express their feelings on someecards.com. I’m pretty sure Venezuela just did it because of the Chavez/Putin/Medvedev bromance, & Nicaragua probably got on board because Venezuela promised them an ice cream & pizza party that has yet to materialize.

Nauru’s love isn’t free, however, as it was reported by the New York Times that they simultaneously requested $50 million in aid from Russia in return for recognizing Abkhazia’s independence which Russia has long supported. Nauru pulled a similar stunt back in 2002 when they severed ties with Taiwan after accepting $130 million from China, which caused Taiwan to say “Who?” and then move on with the rest of their life. Nauru reversed the move a few years later anyway, but by then they’d spent the money on several boxes of organic cereal from Whole Foods, so China had no recourse.

It seems that Nauru’s main industry/export is independence recognition or non-recognition, which is not what you call a sustainable economic model, but is a great gig for as long as you can keep it going just like that whole grad school thing. It’s as if the U.N. is Tiger Woods and Nauru is a not so hot bartender who once appeared on a bad T.V. show that will do lots of things when they smell money. But hey, in today’s world love is love, whether it is based entirely on someone’s finances or not so leave a little extra change on the dresser for them, Abkhazia, cause they need it. And good luck with your independence, I’d recognize it as well if you could get Russia to throw a little love my way too. Until then, have fun as part of Georgia, I’m sure it’s not as bad as it sounds. Ok, I’m lying, it actually sounds pretty shitty.